The outskirts of NYC scare me...

Working in NY for as long as I have, one comes across a plethora of foolishness- not just stupidity but racism, sexism and any other kind of "ism" that you can think of. I know, I know NY is the melting pot... it's a melting pot alright,  of absolute ridiculousness at times. And as much as NYC is an "open book", the outskirts of NY, are about as closed as liquor store on a Sunday in the South.
I work  in "Worstchester", and generally it's ok, but I realize that these people (some of them) have been inbreeding repeatedly for centuries, because their thinking is quite "special".
During my run of employment at this place, I've run into quite a few special (read: occasionally racist) moments:

"Every Woman" except you Black gals...
While in a meeting about a brochure being designed, there was a question about the cover image and which image should be used. The phrase "every woman" was tossed around a few times and I interjected and asked  "Sorry to interrupt, but what is this 'every woman' you guys are talking about?" This woman who's originally from Texas, takes a breath, rolls her neck trying to get the kink out - then says "non- African- American woman"- hmmm- well I think to myself  "is there a colored only bathroom in this bitch too I don't know about?!" I simply say "wow, so black women are a different breed of women." The meeting was over at that point, however, they never used that phrase again, at least not in my presence.

"Can I touch your hair?"
Now every black woman has had some semblance of this experience and I'm not so gentle with folks in these moments. While standing in the doorway talking to a colleague, another co-worker walks up behind me and touches my braids. I asked him "What the hell are you doing?" He says "Whaaa? I just want to feel?" I then continue, "how would you like it if I rubbed that bald q-tip you call a head? Don't touch my hair again, now beat it!"   Of course, Q-ball says I'm being too serious. No I'm not, I don't let random folks (I don't give a damn if I work with them) come up and touch me without being invited!
Since then things have been real "friendly" betwixt us... and I'm still trying to find a stitch of "give a damn."

"I know how dark black people get, my cousin married a Jamaican!" 
While sitting in an impromptu meeting with an Art Director about an ad that was produced featuring a Black woman, an issue with the woman in the image not being "black enough" arose. Some outside agencies we had placed the ad with stated that some folks thought he woman was ethnically ambiguous- she could be black or latina.  "Well what do they mean she's not black enough? Do they want her black black like Jamaican black?" the art director asked.  I looked at the art Asshole and I calmly told him "I want to punch you dead in your face, don't you EVER say that again."  "Well, I didn't mean it like that, but how dark do they want her? Jamaicans are really really dark" - I run through a mental rolodex of all the Jamaican folks I know and of the 9 or so self-identified Jamaicans that I know there are about 2 of 'em that are dark-skinned- I said "your comment is THE most assanine thing I've heard in the last 24 hours!"  He continues, "I'm sorry" - I said "there are mid-toned skinned Jamaicans, hell there are FAIR skinned Jamaicans! You don't know what you're talking about!" He continues "well, let me think... you're right, my cousin married a Jamaican woman and she is light-skinned, okay, well we need a meeting." I said, "good thing your cousin's wife set the bar for all things Jamaican, I just want you to know that was THE most offensive conversation I've had in this place to date." He later comes by my office and apologized again... I just glared at him and said "you do realize how much of a ridiculous fool that made you look don't you?" He agreed.. however, I realize a fool rarely realizes that he is one...


 "I don't like her hair, can we make her look like Celie from the Color Purple instead?" 
Another ad featuring a black woman is currently being created and the woman has "natural" hair – as in kinky, curly, non-Beyonce like. The woman came in a few weeks ago for a photoshoot, she had her hair swept up on her hair with a band around it and a large Afro puff on top. It looked fine.  The art director  (same art director that knows Jamaicans) decides he doesn't like the afro puff on top of her head and tells the designer to remove it. And instead photoshop a small Afro in it's place. Well... the end result made this woman look like a cross between Celie and Buckwheat.  And the designer knew it looked bad.  I said to the designer (who's Asian), "that's like me coming to a photo of you and say "ya know it would look better if your eyes weren't so Asian and almond-like lets swop them out for some round doe-like eyes." She says "I know, that's why I called you out here to look at this" I said well I think that  looks ridiculous and if it gets submitted I'm going to go off. I have to leave for the day, however, feel free to share my sentiments, because when I return I will make sure to say something.  I continued, "let me make something clear, the reason you have a caucasian woman in one ad and a black woman in another is to relate to your targe audience. A white gay man is NOT the target of this creative! And as a black woman I'm offended by the way she looks with that lopped off hair, it looks a mess AND I would not give a damn about the message, b/c I would be disgusted by the image and would ignore the message. ADVERTISING 101 jackasses. And it's important to note- the caucasian version of this ad- the woman looks like she just rolled out of bed with the cast of true blood- she's pale, with freckles and blotchy skin- yet, they've done "mild" retouching - meanwhile she looks like she's a got damn dalmatian.

And this is why Black folks and Black women in particular are seemingly "angry" in the workplace.  It's because of this type of repeated foolishness that creates an uneasy work environment for us. And it's anger but it's also called self defense- because of incidents like this, I'm constantly on guard to make sure that I'm not being disrespected as a Black Woman.

*Angela Davis 'fro, firmly in place. *