Bathroom Warming

So I get an evite to an old friend's housewarming party... nice, I'm not the type of girl who bitches about other folks' registry- I mean we all have our tastes however there's a point where one must stop and re-evaluate certain situations... 

I contemplate whether I'm going to make a brief appearance or not then I read the evite- first of all- the evite wasn't sent by him - who is he that he can't send his own evite? King of Zemunda? But then the other side of my head says- perhaps this is someone who is throwing it FOR him... okay... be nice...

Then I see he's registered at Porcelanosa.. nice place, I don't shop there but I've seen and heard of it - it's a place that sells beautiful stuff for kitchen and bathroom renovations... So I'm like wow nice place to be registered... son, I ain't got no money to be buying stuff from there for him so I'm definitely NOT going... 

Then I see the following statement in the Note about the housewarming -

"Fu has set up a gift registry at Porcelanosa to which a separate email will be sent allowing you to help Fu create the bathroom of his dreams"... I re-read that line- excuse me.. so you want to have DIY bathroom on my money, so you can shit in style?! Is this a housewarming or a fuggin' bathroom warming? Tell people not to bring anything if you don't need anything 'cept some mofo tiles and showerheads!! But to ask people to buy your shower heads and wall and floor tiles is a bit much! You must be smokin' ANGEL DUST! 

Like on our wedding registry we didn't put "cement - 2 buckets, wood planks- 46, nails 2,345" and a note saying "help us build the hut of our dreams!"... cuz that shit is a bit much no!????.... YESSSS!!! 

I always believed you need to consider your desires- yes- but also the capabilities of who you invitin'- if you invitin' mofos who livin' with they momma and u asking them to fund your "Bahamas in Brooklyn" style living room complete with cement and a gang of palm trees perhaps the invite need not be extended to those parties... and keep in mind, it's a recession! Your invited guests are probably in the midst of being caught up in the sweep of a layoff! And you asking them to create the bathroom of your dreams!?- they gonna be asking to stay in your bathtub for a few nights til they get on their feet!

Fugg outta here!